Monday, 6 October 2008

Understanding how teenagers work

How parents (and teachers) can understand teens? Learn about cats!

1. Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name.

2. No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting on them hand and foot.

3. You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.

4. Even if you tell jokes as well as Jay Leno, neither your cat nor your teen will ever crack a smile.

5. No cat or teenager shares your taste in music.

6. Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end without moving, barely breathing.

7. Cats have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did.

8. Cats and teenagers yawn in exactly the same manner, communicating that ultimate ecstasy–a sense of complete and utter boredom.

9. Cats and teenagers do not improve anyone’s furniture.

10. Cats that are free to roam outside sometimes have been known to return in the middle of the night to deposit a dead animal in your bedroom. Teenagers are not above that sort of behavior.

Thus, if you must raise teenagers, the best sources of advice are not other parents, but veterinarians.

It is also a good idea to keep a guidebook on cats on hand at all times. And remember, above all else, put out the food and do not make any sudden moves in their direction.

When they make up their minds, they will finally come to you for some affection and comfort, and it will be a triumphant moment for all concerned.

Author Unknown (Probably a parent with a sense of humor—and a cat!)

Source: English Teacher's Blog


Daughter of the Midwest said...

My Dad once commented that they didn't send me home from the hospital with a manual. This might have helped him!! Although I personally think that he did a pretty good job for a first time dad. Am I prejudiced?

Kristin said...

I love this...too funny.

Lili Bear said...

LOL! A very welcome laugh actually...
I do agree with this, except for the cats leaving a house with an adult: when we took our Jam for a walk, our three cats would come as well... My husband is famous for this in the neighbouhood.
How I wish I lived nearby: I would have sooo loved having a puppy of your lovely dogs...
Take care, Miss Bliss,